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Online Dating Advice—What not to say on a first date

What not to say on a 1st date

Don't EVER tell a woman what to do in a bossy or controlling way.

eHarmony has some good online dating advice for men… at least some of the time.

And continuing from yesterday’s post on things NOT to say on a first date, here are eHarmony’s next three stupid quotes and my ideas on what to say instead.

“I’d love to see you in a dress next time.”
Alert: if on a first date a guy tells you what he’d like to see you in or what you should be doing in any fashion, stay clear. He doesn’t know you well enough to comment on such things, and this is a potential early sign that he could be a control freak. Yuck.

You don’t want to tell the girl what to do. But, you can ask her to do something special for you. So a better way to frame this is, “You look really nice. I have a thing for dresses. If you want to score some points, I’d love to see you in a dress.”

On a first date, don't start in on your problems.

“Can you believe she put out a restraining order on me?”
First, it’s much too early to reveal such information when you are just getting to know someone. Second, this is an obvious sign that he may not be the most balanced individual. Third, it is likely he doesn’t take responsibility for his actions. There are exceptions to the rule, of course, but do you want to stick around and find out if he is one?

Okay, I’ve been in my share of trouble and have some pretty good stories, but I agree not to talk about ANYTHING at all that shows you might have a problem with women. and I’m not going to give you something different to say on this, one. I’m going to tell you to go get some help so you don’t do stuff like that, and then get back in the dating game.

It's not a good idea to talk trash about people on a first date.

“My friend John is such a jerk. He really pissed me off last night…”
“Wow, is he really talking about his friends like that?” you think. People are usually on their best behavior on a first date, so watch out for this potential negative Ned – who could also be a gossiper. Source.

I agree with the premise here, but don’t really think the quote is all that bad if said in the right context. If you want to show that you are the leader of your group and you give others your advice, then I think it’s fine to say something like this. And you can also use it as a way to show what your values are.

For the previous 3 reviews, go here.

And this post has some online dating first date ideas.