Online dating profile—writing yours in a way that gets women to respond

The most important factor for getting women to respond to your profile is the write-up. This is where you can leverage the psychology of attraction to its fullest, and likewise is usually the hardest for guys to get right. This is the phase where you create interest and attraction, and best of all begin to seduce.

The psychology being used at this point is exact. It can be hard to master, but when you hit it right you’ll get so many responses you won’t know what to do with them. In this portion of the profile, there are a lot of small details that make a huge difference. If you don’t get them right, you’re going to get rejected nearly every time. I’ve been on both sides of the coin, and let me tell you—being able to pick and choose between several beautiful women is a great problem to have!

What we’re going to have to do first is show the woman looking at your profile that you’re a cool guy and worth getting to know a little bit better. We have to show off your best character traits, so let’s start with a few qualities that women find attractive and are looking for in a man. There are a ton more than I’m going to list here (and more in Magnetic Profiles), but pick a couple that work for you and we’ll go from there.

Some traits women find attractive in men: health, confidence, masculinity, trustworthiness, humor, have a wide range of interests, value friends and family, edgy, emotionally strong, charismatic, can teach women about themselves.

These qualities just scratch the surface, and I’ve taken them from personal experiences with women, things women have told me (I have interviewed hundreds of women after dating them to find out what made them attracted to me), tons of books/articles, and interviews with master seducers.

These aren’t qualities that you can just list out and plan on having women contact you. For instance, if you say “I’m confident, funny, love doing interesting things and being a bit of a bad boy”, NOBODY is going to respond. Saying you have a great sense of humor, and then having your profile read like an eighth grade textbook is going to have the opposite effect you’re looking for.

If you are a confident person, or have a great sense of humor, it’s going to come out in everything you do, including your writing.

Developing an Opening Paragraph

On some websites the first paragraph of your profile will show up alongside your main profile pic and headline, so you have to make it count. We tested a ton of openings, and found three of them that worked consistently, all over the world, with all different kinds of guys. These openings got the most responses, regardless of age, city, personalities, interests, etc. But that doesn’t mean they are the only three good ways to open. They’re just the most effective that we’ve seen.

We’ll cover all three, but there isn’t room in this post to do it, so I’ll start with the one that I use in the majority of my profiles, and that works best for me. All three are available in more detail in Magnetic Profiles, and with that you’ll have everything available in one place.

The one I use most uses a conversational style that shows her that you understand where she is in life and the things she’s doing. I call it The Conversational Style, and with it you act like you’re right there talking with her in person. It jumps off the page compared to what most of the clueless guys out there are doing, and really works to get responses.

Here’s the exact paragraph from a great profile that got a ton of women to contact me:

“Okay, I know you’re going to look at my pictures before you read my profile. No worries. I’ll wait… Are you back? Okay, good. I’m going to take my dog for a walk while you look at my profile. Send me a quick note when you’re done so I can explain the picture of me riding the water buffalo.”

Another version:

“Okay, I know you’re going to check out my pictures first. I’ll wait while you do. Alright, you’re back, so what do you think of the one where I’m munching on those bamboo worms? I’ll tell you more later but that was out with some tribe in the middle of nowhere Thailand. …”

It’s kind of light, breezy, and has a bit of humor implied. It also demonstrates confidence, a sense of humor, and adds a bit of mystery to what kind of guy I am. I mean really, who munches on bamboo worms or rides a water buffalo? All of those elements work to reel her in and get her to read the rest of my profile.

Try one like that, but obviously change the thing about the worms, buffalo and Thailand—unless they apply to you too. If so, AWESOME!! Use them!!

We’ll go over the other two openers in the next post, and in the meantime try out one of these and see how it works. It’s important to keep the whole profile following the same kind of style and theme, so if you’re having trouble just contact me and we can set up some personal coaching to cut down the learning curve (or I can just write your profile for you).

There are some more great posts on profile writing on the site, so check those out if you have a minute. They may be just what you’re looking for to get online dating to work for you.